Vitriol Espresso "I come in peace. I didn't bring artillery. But I'm pleading with you, with tears in my eyes: If you fuck with me, I'll kill you all." General James Mattis

Made it a little smaller to fit. I about laughed myself into cardiac arrest.

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Priceless. Fucking priceless.

I don't subscribe to this nonsense, by the way. But he's falling into a niche he really doesn't want to find himself associated with during his time as president. It's bad for the country for it's figurehead/leader to be perceived ultimate evil of the world. Does it make sense for anyone to believe in this kind of thing?

Though if there is an antichrist, Obama sure does fit the bill, doesn't he? The man isn't a messiah. Hell, he's not even a good president. Unless he stops thinking his farts don't stink he'll lose everything before he even leaves office. The Antichrist? Really?

I did a post on this some time back about all the points of contention that would describe the antichrist. According to the list (brought up by religious scholars, no less) someone like Glenn Beck falls into the same sorts of categories. Personally, I think the Antichrist will be a little too slick to be seen. More like Rupert Murdoch than a brainless fuckwit like Barack Obama.

Yes, needed this update for some time. And even got one of those funky free domain names. I could have bought one, but where's the fun in that? You can come to http://kogai.tk to find me now if necessary. Easier to type, at least for me. Not that it's not my home page now! But it's easier to bring up on the kindle and my links actually show up! Neato, huh?

Anyway, that's what's up. Next project: Book elements! Time to gather some spiffly ideas! :D

For the first time since childhood I'm going to actually make some New Year resolutions. And do my best to keep to them. Seriously! I need a radical change in my life and maybe now is time to indulge. It's been much too long since I was able to do much of anything but bitch. Okay, here they are (in no particular order):

Lose weight/gain muscle - That means actually going outside (when tolerable) and finding something to do while out there. For this resolution I've gone back to my college days and taken up archery as a past-time sport. I have hunted and fished with a bow, but just shooting a target for a couple hours? It's time to start. Got the bow, got arrows, got a target...just ain't got weather. It's colder than a witch's tit out there, yanno.

Investigate religion - And I mean that sincerely. Though I've had the education I've not been to the pulpit in some time. I'ma see what rolls.

Write - Yes, the great American novel. It's been on my mind for years and now I need to actually write it. I'm sick of having this idea molding behind my forehead. It'll be strange, though, to finally get it to a medium that other people can see.

Save money - Need to open that account and start the payments going in!

Stabilize - Yeah.

Get the MUSH/MUCK going full bore again - It seems we have a message board with no board and a chat room with no chat. If I have to change codebases and rebuild again I will. Doing nothing on this thing is driving me insane.

Read - I've always been a voracious reader, but rarely with the opportunity to get books. With the new Kindle mom got me I can download them for a few bucks. That's hawt. So I'm gonna take that fuckin thing with me everywhere I go. And read whenever possible.

Socialize - Yeah, I need to find a way to meet people. And maybe meet people I already know. I hate myself, but that shouldn't mean they hate the way I look/act. It's gonna be hard, but I want to get out and meet those faceless names I see all the time.

And there you go. My list of things I want to do this year. Though the very first one is going to be reading and right after that the first one. XD I can tell you that just cuz of what I got for Christmas. Anyway, happy happy. Here's lookin forward to a year that doesn't suck (like the last ten or so :P).

After reading over these stories: Michelle Malkin Clown Alert: Janet Napolitano says the "system worked."

What I'd like to know is when Napolitano said that the system worked, was she being facetious or truthful? Because if she was being truthful and the system was working as intended that means, by extrapolation, that the Department of Homeland Security is a superfluous organization. Completely meaningless except that it pays paychecks out to people who do nothing. The people on the plane, and also by extrapolation, the people everywhere in the United States are on their own.

So I ask again, was she joking around or did she really mean that the system worked accordingly?

On an offhand? Yeah, I think she's a stupid twat. How's that for not sleeping? Hahahaha...I scare myself sometimes.

Feeling the melancholy thing, but on the whole much better than the last week. Got punched in the head by a double dose of depression, added in a shot of anxiety and a splash of mania. Not a very nice cocktail. So I indulged in the legal medicinal services available to one my age and just about choked on my own tongue. Which was fun, let me tell you. No...really. I was laughing too hard and bit down on my tongue. Didn't change the funny, just added a little pain.

Then it sort of hit me that I could laugh through it. So I did. Kinda neat those mini epiphanies that come out of nowhere.

Sent another email to the local college. Apparently they have a transit system between my shitty town and their campus now. Although I have no clue when it runs, I've not seen it here. If it exists that'd rock. I could take a couple of classes and not have to worry about the car breaking down on the way. Or the fact that it gets 5mpg.

Told my brother I'm a bit of a transgender. That was hard. Not that I don't enjoy being female, I'm just too dominant to be happy with anyone NORMAL. God, that feels so good to say. Sorry, but I can't see myself living with anyone who isn't afraid to be stronger than me. Everyone I think I might be capable of loving in that way turns out to be so damn weak where I need them to be strong. All I ever asked for was a backbone, a huge fucking heart, and a complete understanding of the fact that...I honestly hate myself. I do. Always have. Still do. Not gonna change. If I could not be me for a million bucks? I'd sell a kidney.

So there you have it. My need for someone to understand that I'm not male or female, I'm both. And I'm neither. Sex is more a play on dominance and submission to me and anyone strong enough to dominate my huge fucked up personality usually goes to find someone a bit more stable in the emotional facilities. I'm nothing anyone has ever dealt with before, apparently. Not even my shrink wants to discuss it. Hell, in another era I'd be a nun..I have no doubt...Mother Superior. Hahahahahahaha. *walks like a penguin*

Ah hell, I'm over 40 and I have no dreams. How pitiful is that? I need to find a few somewhere.